from the mom
It is not that my life is bad. It isn't. It is so good, but too much sometimes. Tonight I'm overwhelmed. I had help with housework from my husband and it still isn't done. (Plus I want to do it "my way" and there simply isn't time for me to do it all right now.) The budget is in disarray and we didn't manage to make it even half of a month into the new year before we'd failed to live up to it. (And I had relaxed the categories we never make it in.) I feel like I have no time to communicate with friends and family. And I NEED to communicate. (Why do you think I'm blogging when I'm overwhelmed and should be in bed at nearly midnight?) I want to be a good mother and a good wife and a good person. I feel like I'm failing at all of them right now. I think I'll feel better tomorrow. I hope so.
9 comments:
I'm right with you, honey, but know that's no consolation at all.. I just arrived home after a day spent traveling to and from and being with Minnie and sister's and your uncle Gary, and I have a table full of projects left over from last week, but not done or put away... I've been working half the evening, but no one would know it from the projects waiting including laundry, etc. But I did take a few minutes to watch a few good snippets from "Shall We Dance" and it's been a productive day, despite so much more waiting to be done! I am blessed!
So true. It always makes me feel guilty to be upset at life for being good--just too much of it. Which, on top of overwhelmed, is not a good feeling. Or the alternative is knocking myself out to stay up and then making myself sick. Hope things look better this morning!
I hope you got some sleep and feel better. You KNOW you are a good person,wife and mother. We all feel overwhelmed sometimes, and late at night it seem worse.Remember, each minute, each day at a time.
Judy
I'm one of those people that thinks I'm a bad person if I can't do everything I want to do, or finish what I think I should be able to finish, etc. JB has to remind me sometimes that loving God, loving him...and soon loving my baby is the most important thing. If I can't accomplish everything on my "To do" list or if we go over budget, it doesn't mean I'm a failure. God will help you and give you strength to accomplish what you need to each day. And those things that remain undone or unfinished...will still be there for you tomorrow:) Hope today is brighter for you! Love ya!
I'm glad you post about days like this because I have them too! Some days I feel like I'm just adding to my "to do" list, rather than crossing things (ANY thing) off. I hate feeling tired in general, but it's especially bad when I've been so unproductive. You're in my prayers and thoughts!
Life goes in waves. You're at the bottom of one right now! Of course, you're also fresh home from a cross-country trip with two small children.
Who actually has house, budget, relationships, and kids all balanced at one time? (Whoever that mythical woman is, she's very loud in my head.)
As my priest says to me, oh, every other month or so, "Don't beat yourself up." You'll get caught up. Downtimes don't mean you're a failure.
And you ARE a great person and a wonderful mother. Your friends love you and your children are happy.
-- SJ
(I'm so good at this sermon because I have to give it to myself so often.)
HEY! I could have written this post myself. And am I taking care of things around the house now that the kid FINALLY decided to sleep? Not on your life. I'm vegging in front of the computer.....COMMUNICATING as best as I can online. =) It makes me feel human.
HEY! I could have written this post myself. And am I taking care of things around the house now that the kid FINALLY decided to sleep? Not on your life. I'm vegging in front of the computer.....COMMUNICATING as best as I can online. =) It makes me feel human.
(I like to post a lot. Sorry about that.)
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