The Spirit

In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us through wordless groans. And he who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for God’s people in accordance with the will of God. -Roman 8:26-27

I can't really decide on a "favorite verse" in the Bible. But this one is up there. And today it was the verse for my evening devotional. It was perfect timing. 

Today is the birthday of my friend Gary. Gary was a Marine with a big growl. He liked to be scary; because he was a giant softie and he didn't want anyone to know. He and his wife are dear friends and before we moved east, I went to hang out with Judy. As I drove away, we were a little teary and Gary worked hard to keep us from crying. I am glad I don't know the future or I would have been bawling like a baby. 

Gary was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer shortly after Labor Day and died on Thanksgiving. I was getting ready to leave for a family reunion in New York when the news came in that the end of Gary's pain was coming quickly.

I didn't know how to pray. I kept clutching at words and phrases and it all felt very trite, not enough. I remember saying over and over, "God, you know." 

You know, what I do not. You know what I cannot. 

I'm always glad at these moments that God became man. That even though He can see outside of time and knows what a tiny grain of sand our earthly lives are in the ocean of eternity, He still went through loss. Historians say Joseph who raised him as a father proceeded him in death. He knows as a man what loss is like. He can feel our pain and the Spirit is praying for us in these moments when words escape.  

The intercession of the Spirit in our lives is a huge relief for me. When I'm suffering with my god-complex, I need to stop and remember that I'm called to pray as an act of obedience and for my own good. I have the privilege of entering in to the work the Spirit is doing. But I don't have to be God. I don't have to know. I need to rest in the peace of knowing the work goes on, with or without me.