Oh, the Mystery of 7-year olds

About a month ago, Ben came to me and said, "Mom, I know something bad happened in 2001 but I'm not sure what it was."

I was stunned. I had concluded on the 10th anniversary of 9/11 that he didn't seem that aware and therefore, I would postpone that particular talk.

I started in by asking why he knew something bad had happened then. And he stringed together an interview he had read with an NFL player who had mentioned 9/11 and an illustration (not a photo) in a book he had seen of the fiery Twin Towers.

I tend to say too much and so I was hesitant. I told him it was a difficult time for our country and I was happy to talk to him about it but I wondered what he thought happened.

He thought a helicopter or maybe two hit some buildings. So I carefully told him they were airplanes and that those buildings were in New York. "Oh, so it happened in New York City."

Pause.

"Well, and the Pentagon."

"In Virginia? But you were living there then, right?"

Our conversation went a little further and then I told him that some of the details might be scary. So I would answer questions but I wanted him to be sure he was ready to know more. He decided he had heard enough for the day.

It did come back when we saw the Pentagon (and the new 9/11 Memorial) in D.C. but he has otherwise left it alone. For now.

But he will still come up with some interesting things now and then. He recently apologized for the painful delivery I went through with him. And told me he was sorry that being a woman was so painful but that it was sometimes hard to be a man too. I had to laugh. And pause to remember that he hears a lot more than we realize.

Ben likes to tell us what we want to hear. You have to really make him talk with you and it can be hard. He wants to make us happy and move on and this a quality that concerns me as we head into pre-adolescence. You want the truth so you can help them work through things. And he knows that parenting Kyrie leaves me into a pile of exhaustion by the end of the day and he would prefer not to go that route. Keep the peace is his motto.

But he is 7 and he is more emotional than usual. And he would rather play computer games and X-Box than do schoolwork.

He is becoming a little man and I am enjoying him.